“We must turn the burdens into blessings.” Jeffrey Frankel”

— Jeffrey Frankel

Jeffrey’s family (left to right), Isaiah (son), Leah (Isaiah’s girlfriend), Rachel (Jeffrey’s wife), Sofia (daughter), and Jeffrey

Jeffrey Frankel’s story is very difficult to handle, and even more difficult to understand…

Jeffrey was a 22-year-old student at UC Santa Barbara back in 1994. Life was running smoothly, or so he thought. Like so many other students he needed to do laundry and planned to travel a little over 100 miles home to visit his parents, his girlfriend, grab a good home cooked meal, and of course clean the clothes. The weekend was going well, visiting with friends and family… and even spent Saturday night at an amazing rock concert.

Everything seemed to be normal. When Sunday rolled around, he thought about heading back to school. He stayed home while his parents took his siblings to religious school. Jeffrey started feeling lightheaded. Walking into his parent’s room to lie down, his legs suddenly gave way, sending him crashing to the floor. Jeffrey made his attempts to stand up but kept collapsing. He struggled to climb onto the bed, remaining there motionless and alone until his parents returned. He was terrified, not knowing when someone would return, and found himself staring at the clock and waiting.

His parents returned and recognized something was obviously very wrong, so they rushed Jeffrey to the emergency room. Jeffrey was confused and losing consciousness. As things progressed his memory began to fade, only to resume later. Much later. Like 12 days later. Those twelve days would be lost forever, and time seemingly had not passed, but the world around Jeffrey had changed dramatically.

Jeffrey in 1994 at the time of his diagnosis. His little brother, Matthew, is pictured in the background.

Imagine the loss of two weeks of your life through no fault of your own… Two weeks of which you have no memory whatsoever.

〰️

Imagine the loss of two weeks of your life through no fault of your own… Two weeks of which you have no memory whatsoever. 〰️

That day Jeffrey would begin an initial 28-day hospitalization. What caused him to collapse that morning was a massive stroke. It had been caused by a thickening of the blood that had clotted in his brain, in part the definition of a stroke. This hypercoagulable state of Jeffrey’s blood was caused by a cancerous tumor found in his right testicle. He was diagnosed with a choriocarcinoma the size of a small grapefruit. After several tests, the cancer had spread to both lungs, but found no lymph node involvement. During that initial stay in the hospital, he was in ICU on life support for the first 12 days. The cancer had riddled his body, and doctors offered Jeffrey’s family the news - They prepared for the worst as he had been given just a 1% chance of making it through the night.

Jeffrey said he wasn’t ready to go. He recalls seeing those pearly white gates, but knew he had more work to do in this world. By the time he came to, family shared with him the horrors. He had suffered a stroke and been diagnosed with cancer… Jeffrey had surgery to extract the testicular tumor and he had already started on his first round of chemotherapy. The fact that he battled each of those initial nights to remain alive, even those where he was in a medically induced coma, was amazing to the doctors, clergy, and to his family.

Over the next 6 months or so, Jeffrey took seven rounds of Cisplatin Chemotherapy. It is important to share that Jeffrey was on a trial of a new drug that was soon to hit the market. Doctors shared about the trial and that due to the aggressive nature of the case, other drugs wouldn’t have shrunk the tumors in time to save him. Today this drug is approved and used in the majority of this type of cell. Jeffrey also suffered hemi-paralysis due to the stroke and needed speech, occupational, and physical therapies to gain back use of his extremities and voice. It was a tremendous uphill climb, but Jeffrey had never stepped away from adversity. He believed his job was to Challenge Adversity.

This major medical ailment had Jeffrey remain in the LA Area under his parent’s roof. He returned to school that next fall to continue his education. He finished his degree and realized that he wanted to work with children and teens; guiding them to grow as leaders. His first role post university graduation would see him take on his next challenge. He left California and moved across the country to start his career in nonprofit executive management in Charleston, SC. Jeffrey knew after this life-threatening time, he wanted to prove to himself and to the world he was capable of living on his own and building this newfound career for himself. After more than 25 years in the field and a career that saw time working in 6 different states, Jeffrey currently makes his home in San Diego, CA where he is the Executive Director of a nonprofit faith center. His life has been filled with teaching leadership, managing logistics, growing communities, and marching boards of directors toward communal visions.

During the years since Jeffrey’s diagnosis, he married his longtime girlfriend. She was at his side throughout his diagnosis, treatment, and recovery. When Jeffrey found out that while the chemotherapy that killed the cancer cells, it also wreaked havoc with all cells including his sperm cells. Jeffrey and his wife always knew they wanted to adopt even before cancer, but this then became the best option for them to have the family they knew they wanted. The couple brought home their first angel, Isaiah Charles in 2001. This was followed by another blessing in 2004 when their family was completed with the birth and placement of their daughter Sofia Lee-El. Jeffrey has always said cancer took away his chance to have natural born children. He suggested that both he and G-d always knew he could be a father.

Before and After Jeffrey’s recent health program (2020 and 2023)

In February of 2024, Jeffrey celebrated 30 post-diagnosis. During this time, he has remained “cancer clean”. During the initial 28-day hospitalization Jeffrey had dramatic weight loss, losing approximately 60 pounds in that first stay. Not the healthy way to lose weight. He started out a big guy tilting the scales upward of 230+ pounds. The weight returned after treatment and when the COVID pandemic hit, Jeffrey needed to grab onto something he could control. At this point Jeffrey had grown to about 250 pounds. He, himself, said he had an irrational fear…a fear that if he were to have a relapse, he would need to remain heavy so if he lost a large amount of weight due to sickness, he would be ok. Jeffrey knew this fear was irrational, but he could not get himself over the anxiousness to make it happen. Once again, he chose to challenge adversity and find the right fitness program to get engaged with. With a rational head on his shoulders, he knew that if he was more aware of his body, his feelings, and his mindset he would trim down and be more apt to recognize changes in his body and seek the appropriate medical attention should it be needed. In 2021, he embarked on a health journey that saw him trim over 70 pounds off his frame and as he said, “Get fit at fifty”. He has lost weight and has optimized his health, maintaining his weight loss now for 3+ years. Jeffrey now also coaches clients in weight management, health, and well-being.

Additionally, during the pandemic, Jeffrey had time to author his memoirs entitled But I’m a Good Me, which is available on Amazon. He says it’s autobiographical, but not an autobiography. He says it’s his version of his life. Chocked full of challenges, lessons, growth, and battles, Jeffrey realizes he has gone through many aspects that others never do. He says everything in life can be a “teachable moment” when we open our eyes to the possibilities. He shares that if he could turn back the hands of time, he would not seek to change the course of events that he has been placed in. He would not give back cancer or the fact that he suffered a stroke. He wouldn’t give back the day that he got the report that he would never have children of his own. Each experience builds the fortress around us. Each experience guides the next. Life is happening for us, not to us. We must be open to the blessings and learn to even see our worst days as lessons and grow from them.

Jeffrey meditating down by the Penasquitos Creek (2023)

Jeffrey shares that 30 years ago there was no network of social media sites to connect with, no websites to search out information, support groups. Today this is one of the blessings for newly diagnosed patients. It wasn’t until Jeffrey was a few months shy of his 30-year anniversary of his diagnosis that he linked arms with several charities. He was seeking support as he approached this milestone. He was amazed by all he found. He learned that support is always good but that 30 years into his journey he has so much to offer the communities he is now in touch with. His work with nonprofits taught him to teach leadership Today he looks forward to serving as a mentor to others currently battling and offering hope as a firsthand survivor. He says he never liked labels, but one he will always be proud of is that of “Survivor”. He represented Testicular Cancer Awareness Foundation in April of 2024 at a local college health fair. He has partnered with a current patient and together they share their testicular cancer journeys. With another organization he is set to go on a summer retreat up in the mountains, to bond and share and support the men both during and after their treatment. He actively engages in multiple support groups serving as a mentor and friend to those deep in their journeys.

Jeffrey and the family dog, Honey (2024)

It’s like the old adage, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Jeffrey says, “We must turn the burdens into blessings.” Jeffrey does exactly that in his nonprofit full-time role, his health and wellness coaching, the charities he is engaged with, and the writing of his books. When he chooses to retire, he looks to write more, teach more, and guide more people to find the happiness within the drama that is life!